how to make DATING APPS work for you
Now that you know that online dating is a business, the paradox of choice, and the pitfalls of the shoppers’ mindset how can you make online dating work for you?
You are the one using the app, don’t let it use you. Turn off push notifications take breaks from the app as needed, in order to not get overwhelmed.
If you are not attracting enough prospective partners how can you make your profile more appealing? Do you need to get better pictures, update your profile, or be more open?
people are more forgiving in person
Stop with the hundred questions on email, text, or phone. Push to meet someone in person, the only way to assess chemistry is in person.
Many couples in long-term relationships will tell you that if they had met their partner online they may not have been an obvious fit. In real life, people are more forgiving especially when there is a mutual connection.
When it comes to finding a partner online be prepared for doing some sifting. It may take you a while to sort through people, go on dates, and get to know people on a deeper level to assess real potential.
Try not to take things too personally but be able to be objective and make changes as necessary. If things are not going well can you figure out what changes you need to make? Is it timing, or do you need to look deeper into your own attachment style?
Clients will ask me how long they have to date, the answer will vary. You have to keep at it until you are successful. A consumer reports article called, ‘Match me if you can.’ looking at which dating sites were most popular didn’t find obvious differences. Their advice was that all had pros and cons but in the end, if you stick with them they work.
While online dating apps are the easiest way to meet, be careful about falling into the Paradox of Choice and/or adopting the Shopper’s mindset. Remember the pool is not endless and you must give people a chance by meeting in person. Keep your standards high but your expectations reasonable. It takes time to build a connection and to figure out whether someone is right for you.
Don’t forget to follow me on Instagram and Facebook I post almost every day and it’s the best way to stay connected.
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